A little over two years ago I started carrying a note with me inside of my wallet. I keep it behind my license – just in case. In case for what? Well, in case something happens to me and I’m unable to talk.
I keep it tucked between my license and body donor ID card. I figured those would be the two cards people would want to see most – unless somebody was robbing my unconscious body. Not cool people, not cool. Some may call me paranoid or morbid, but I like to think of it as being prepared. Death doesn’t scare me as much as not being able to say goodbye. And having so many people I care about in other states, I realized that I would never know if something happened to them. Read more…
I think I’m pretty honest in my blog. I rarely have one of those moments where I stop myself from writing something because someone I know reads this. I’m a fairly open person and sometimes I think I might share too much. I’ve given my blog URL out to family members in hopes that they’d read it. I think my mom might be the only regular but that’s okay.
I did decide to take the link off my outgoing emails only because I didn’t want to make it easier for future employers to find me 🙂 Not that I have anything to hide. If you’re not going to hire me because I write about plasma sperm, well, that sucks, but I don’t want to work for someone who doesn’t has a sense of humor. Anyway…I’m getting off track. Read more…
I’m taking a shower, showing off my vocal skills like the rock star I am, completely oblivious to what I’m doing.
I get out, wrap my hair in a towel and dry myself off. I unwrap my hair and as soon as I pull a brush through it i ask myself out loud, “Did I wash my hair? If so, did I rinse out the conditioner?”
I grabbed my hair to feel for any sliminess. Okay, no conditioner. Does that mean I didn’t wash it? Well I wasn’t about to hop back in and do it. No encore for me this afternoon folks!
I dried it and smelled it. Survey says? It smells good! This leads me to believe that I did in fact wash my hair.
Next time, a little less singing, a little more paying attention. I’m lucky I didn’t attempt to shave.
* That’s not my real shower curtain. I’d panic every time I opened my eyes in the shower or walked into the bathroom in the middle of the night.
What am I hanging onto? I’ve been asking myself that a lot this last week. The situation is obviously less than ideal. If I were giving advice to anyone else I would tell them to walk and they deserve so much better. Realizing that this relationship isn’t optimal, why do I continue to prolong the inevitable? If I am so unhappy, what am I waiting for? Why should I spend anymore time letting his actions, or lack of, bother me so much? Why should I continue to wait around in hoping that someone who isn’t even fighting for me will change?
Fear. Yes, jealously’s ugly sister, Fear.
I’m afraid of being forgettable. I’m afraid that he’ll carry on with his normal day-to-day life as if I were never a part of it. I’m afraid that he’ll never realize I should have meant so much more than his own agenda. That I’ll never have meant as much to him as he meant to me. I’m afraid to acknowledge all the time I spent waiting was a waste. I’m afraid that I loved him more than he ever loved me. I’m afraid that I’ll never be worth it, never be enough, always be an issue of convenience. Read more…
If you were to ask me what I did yesterday, I would respond, “only the most awesomest things ever!” It all began around 9:30 a.m. My cousin Sara, her boyfriend, his son and some dude picked me up to head downtown for the St. Patrick’s Day parade. It was exciting to look out of the window and see the streets filled with people dressed in green. Green is my favorite color you know…
I’ve never been to a parade so this was pretty exciting. It was cold, but that didn’t stop anyone from lining up along the streets. When I think of a St. Pats parade, I think of Irish, shamrocks, leprechauns and the sort. Sure there were those…but there were also unicorns, plumbers, sheet metal workers and politicians. I did get a green hat though so I’m okay with that. My cousin left early but I stayed since I was going to be meeting Miss Jamie later. Read more…
When I think of the word “maid” doing work doesn’t come to mind.
Beer maid – They get your beer for you so you don’t have to.
Nursey maid – Aren’t these the same as nannies? Well, whatever, they take care of the kiddies for you.
Kitchen maid – Also known as a personal chef I’m sure. They cook so you don’t have to.
Cleaning maids – I see them driving around all the time. They clean your house so you don’t have to.
Old maid – I’m not sure what they do for you.
Littermaid – These fancy little boxes should clean cat poop for you so you don’t have to. Read more…
I forgot how much I love “Dirty Dancing.” I’m not sure what it is about that movie that just makes me swoon when I watch it. I get the biggest smile when Johnny says “nobody puts Baby in the corner.” Ugh! Love it! Seriously, one of my favorite movies of all time.When I was younger I loved it because of the shoes. All the sparkles, the shininess. Beautiful shoes and dresses! Now I have no idea. I still get giddy over the shoes even though I’d never wear them. I appreciate the dancing much more these days. Holy crap that stuff looks difficult. I wish I could dance like that.
Most of all, I wish I knew Johnny so he could teach me how to dance and then we could make out to ridiculous music and run away together. Le sigh….
One can dream!
For the record, I sing throughout the ENTIRE movie. I even dance a little. Watch out!
This weekend has been full of ups and downs. The news I received Thursday night has pretty much left me shocked, worried, happy and heartbroken. Can I roll those all into one? I’m doing it anyway. I have been trying to pace myself and control tears by telling myself that “hey, my relationship isn’t over yet. Don’t freak out.” But it doesn’t help that I can feel this incredible distance growing between us and I’m feeling more and more pushed away. Read more…
I’m a bit late with this post and most of the bloggers who were there beat me with their posts.That’s okay. I didn’t want to bombard our shared readers with 8 different stories of the same evening 🙂 So consider my laziness a gift to you.
Despite what I wrote in an earlier post, I had a lot of fun. I was really nervous heading out there. Traffic was against me as it was stop and go for a good 20 minutes along Irving Park Road. That gave me just enough time to start freaking out. “Holy hell. Where am I going? I’ve never really been to a bar? How will I know who’s who? Will I even recognize any of them? I’m going to walk in and make a complete ass of myself aren’t I?” Read more…
I have a love/hate relationship with my neck. For the last two months I’ve been experiencing a lot of neck pain. I switched to a memory foam pillow in hopes it would help keep my neck properly angled while sleeping. It ended up making the pain worse. I’ve been switching back and forth between that pillow and the other three I have on my bed. No luck. It doesn’t help that I’ve been writing a lot at work on a desk that is much too high. This resulted in my shoulder being elevated. What muscle does that bring to mind? If you said the levator scapula muscle, you are correct. Please direct your attention to the photo on the side. Read more…